How much more?
I'm wondering how much more I can take as far as stress goes right now.
Besides all the problems Lisa has had in the last several months, including losing her grandmother and traveling back and forth to Florida three times plus traveling to Ithaca to buy the house...
I've had severe health problems for over a year -- a dentist pulled the wrong tooth, plus I've had two root canals and a severe oral infection ending in oral surgery... I started college with skyrocketing gas prices and ended up spending $1400 in gas last semester... then I was diagnosed with degenerative disc disease... my arm went numb and I was in awful pain for months... I had to have physical therapy for it for three months...
Then, when things just looked like they were getting better... I was rushed into the emergency room three weeks ago with heart palpitations... and since then my heart hasn't been right... I was hooked up to a heart monitor and have had every blood and urine and MRI and CAT scan test known to man... I haven't been allowed to drive for weeks...
This last weekend, three days after the doctor put me on beta-blockers for my heart... we traveled to Ithaca to close on the house... the house we now can't use because of a bad well. So, now poor Lisa owns a useless house and she's fighting with the lawyers and the builder about getting things done. I had to fly home on Sunday without her because I had to get home for Joshua and because I had a doctor's apt. on Monday morning... and that was all after only getting 3 hours sleep the night before because we were up late at the new house trying to figure out what the hell went wrong with the stupid water at the house...
On top of all of this I've been ATTEMPTING to write a term paper and study for exams...
I went to a cardiologist and a GYN in the last two days, spent HOURS in their offices... only to be told that I may have simple hypertension... but then my blood pressure went down to 90/60 today while at the GYN, he was more concerned about my low blood pressure than he was the cysts on my ovary... yes, the ultrasounds I had last week show that I have two small cysts on my right ovary... but does he want to do anything about them? No. Because I've been having them all my life he would rather I wait until I get to NY to have my new GYN decide to open me up and take a look ... I PROBABLY have endometriosis again, but he doesn't want to deal with me since I'm moving and he doesn't want to be rushed...
The last few days I noticed I've had a slight sore throat... it never got worse, but never got better... it's not a cold... it's not strep throat... sure enough... I'm allergice to the fucking beta-blockers... the doctor just called me for the second time today to make sure I was still alive and kicking and that I hadn't asphyxiated from the allergic reaction. She wants to try to switch my meds, but she's not sure what the fuck to give me since I'm allergic to pretty much everything and all beta blockers are pretty much the same. She told me to not take them again...ever. So now I'm left with no meds, stress up the wazooo and a palpitating heart... lovely.
To top it all off... we've also had one cat go through major surgery for her thyroid (Troi), one cat became lame from a fight last week (Pierre), and now, Kira, our "bed kitty", is going into kidney failure. I had taken her to the vet this afternoon because when I came home from Ithaca the other day I noticed she had lost more weight and her fur looked very ratty. On top of that she's been begging for tons of water every time I turn around. She about killed three cats this morning getting into the bathroom to search for water... at the vet, they took some blood... then ten minutes after I walked in the door after leaving their office the vet called... telling me to get Kira back to the office ASAP because the blood test showed that she was going into kidney failure and they needed to try to flush her kidneys out so she doesn't die... she's 12 years old and I love her to death. She sleeps between Lisa and I every single night, between our pillows. Kira looks over me while I sleep. She's like my guardian angel. When I wake up in the middle of the night she looks at me with the sweetest look and sits on the edge of the bed until I come back after going to the bathroom... I hope she doesn't die... I really need her beside me at night... Lisa isn't home and now Kira will be at the vets until tomorrow at least... Without Lisa NOR Kira in bed with me it will be so lonely now... I hope Kira will be ok. I don't know how I'll handle it if something happens to her right now. I'm going to miss her so fucking much. I really bonded with her in the last two years. I'm hitting my stress limit and I really don't want to lose Kira right now...
I just got home a few minutes ago and I'm exhausted. I've been running around town all day and have only eaten one rushed meal all day in between grocery shopping, doctors' visits, vet's visits, and phone calls...
I think I'll go drown my sorrows in some double stuff oreos and milk ...
Besides all the problems Lisa has had in the last several months, including losing her grandmother and traveling back and forth to Florida three times plus traveling to Ithaca to buy the house...
I've had severe health problems for over a year -- a dentist pulled the wrong tooth, plus I've had two root canals and a severe oral infection ending in oral surgery... I started college with skyrocketing gas prices and ended up spending $1400 in gas last semester... then I was diagnosed with degenerative disc disease... my arm went numb and I was in awful pain for months... I had to have physical therapy for it for three months...
Then, when things just looked like they were getting better... I was rushed into the emergency room three weeks ago with heart palpitations... and since then my heart hasn't been right... I was hooked up to a heart monitor and have had every blood and urine and MRI and CAT scan test known to man... I haven't been allowed to drive for weeks...
This last weekend, three days after the doctor put me on beta-blockers for my heart... we traveled to Ithaca to close on the house... the house we now can't use because of a bad well. So, now poor Lisa owns a useless house and she's fighting with the lawyers and the builder about getting things done. I had to fly home on Sunday without her because I had to get home for Joshua and because I had a doctor's apt. on Monday morning... and that was all after only getting 3 hours sleep the night before because we were up late at the new house trying to figure out what the hell went wrong with the stupid water at the house...
On top of all of this I've been ATTEMPTING to write a term paper and study for exams...
I went to a cardiologist and a GYN in the last two days, spent HOURS in their offices... only to be told that I may have simple hypertension... but then my blood pressure went down to 90/60 today while at the GYN, he was more concerned about my low blood pressure than he was the cysts on my ovary... yes, the ultrasounds I had last week show that I have two small cysts on my right ovary... but does he want to do anything about them? No. Because I've been having them all my life he would rather I wait until I get to NY to have my new GYN decide to open me up and take a look ... I PROBABLY have endometriosis again, but he doesn't want to deal with me since I'm moving and he doesn't want to be rushed...
The last few days I noticed I've had a slight sore throat... it never got worse, but never got better... it's not a cold... it's not strep throat... sure enough... I'm allergice to the fucking beta-blockers... the doctor just called me for the second time today to make sure I was still alive and kicking and that I hadn't asphyxiated from the allergic reaction. She wants to try to switch my meds, but she's not sure what the fuck to give me since I'm allergic to pretty much everything and all beta blockers are pretty much the same. She told me to not take them again...ever. So now I'm left with no meds, stress up the wazooo and a palpitating heart... lovely.
To top it all off... we've also had one cat go through major surgery for her thyroid (Troi), one cat became lame from a fight last week (Pierre), and now, Kira, our "bed kitty", is going into kidney failure. I had taken her to the vet this afternoon because when I came home from Ithaca the other day I noticed she had lost more weight and her fur looked very ratty. On top of that she's been begging for tons of water every time I turn around. She about killed three cats this morning getting into the bathroom to search for water... at the vet, they took some blood... then ten minutes after I walked in the door after leaving their office the vet called... telling me to get Kira back to the office ASAP because the blood test showed that she was going into kidney failure and they needed to try to flush her kidneys out so she doesn't die... she's 12 years old and I love her to death. She sleeps between Lisa and I every single night, between our pillows. Kira looks over me while I sleep. She's like my guardian angel. When I wake up in the middle of the night she looks at me with the sweetest look and sits on the edge of the bed until I come back after going to the bathroom... I hope she doesn't die... I really need her beside me at night... Lisa isn't home and now Kira will be at the vets until tomorrow at least... Without Lisa NOR Kira in bed with me it will be so lonely now... I hope Kira will be ok. I don't know how I'll handle it if something happens to her right now. I'm going to miss her so fucking much. I really bonded with her in the last two years. I'm hitting my stress limit and I really don't want to lose Kira right now...
I just got home a few minutes ago and I'm exhausted. I've been running around town all day and have only eaten one rushed meal all day in between grocery shopping, doctors' visits, vet's visits, and phone calls...
I think I'll go drown my sorrows in some double stuff oreos and milk ...
posted by Artist...Lesbian...Someone new... at
3:47 PM
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